It’s been so long since I’ve felt like writing. I thought I’d write about my experience in Mirival with my dear friend, but when it came down to it, I didn’t want to. I think this time after treatment is so transitional, it’s hard to know where to put my feet and when to start walking forward again. But every day goes by whether I know what to do or not. I find myself stronger, happier, more centered and grounded. I am beginning to write about my experience of navigating the waters of allopathic medicine in my shamanic way and I hope to contribute to other people as they are on the journey.
It’s only been 9 months since the last radiation treatment. I am like a new born in so many ways. Learning to walk and yearning to fly.
I was at Kimono my house in emeryville. Sitting in a black leather chair on rollers. It felt like a yard sale find. I’d say dusty, but it wasn’t. On a fake wood end table were these things called a Singamajig. Two of them. When you pressed its belly the mouth formed a perfect O and a tone flowed out. The lips of this mouth looked like those terry cloth hair ties used on dolls or little girls? An the shape of the mouth was modulated according to the tone. I don’t know what it was but as I pressed its belly and listened to the tone and took in the round terry cloth mouth, the most authentic delightful belly laugh rang out from my lips. I just grinned and felt the delight in my whole body.
The owner came over after I’d been fooling around with them for a little bit trying to get them to harmonize. In her experienced hands she had one singing Oh When the Saints, and the other one harmonizing and I thought I would explode with joy. The owner was so tickled with her own toys and the kids were smiling and I don’t know what it was…oh yes I do…it felt like HEALTH!
We went on to walk in Strawberry canyon. My childrens legs sturdy and healthy. the oaks and the sky together at once the whining banter and my love’s smile. My family and the ground beneath my feet and I feel so much love and my heart lifts in joy.
Health in every cell. Light passing through and out again, cells respirating joy
This is what health feels like.